One of the great mysteries—and adventures—of my Christian life has been learning to discern the will or voice of God.

I was raised in a church tradition in which one didn’t hear the voice of God. We didn’t need to—we had the completed Word of God in the Bible. But conversely, God did guide—revealing His will through things like circumstances, internal peace, godly counsel, and of course through reading the Bible. We didn’t believe in new revelation, but in the application of existing revelation to our own personal situation—and in so doing could discern the “still small voice” of the Spirit. 

There’s good caution here. There’s a real danger in allowing subjective impressions to override the Bible, and many have been hurt or misled by someone saying, “God told me you should…” or “I have a word from the Lord.” That kind of language often carries more authority than it should and can be used carelessly—or even manipulatively. Staying anchored in Scripture is understandable and necessary.

But it always seemed a little “right hand, left hand” to me. If the Holy Spirit was applying His Word or giving a settled sense of direction in a specific situation—say, who to marry or which job to take—wasn’t that Him speaking? At some point, the distinction between “guidance” and “speaking” feels like semantic.  And if God is willing to communicate for the big stuff… what about the small stuff?

When I was in college there was a book called Decision Making and the Will of God which promoted the “wisdom” view. It proposed that God’s will was primarily ethical. There are many statements in the Bible which explicitly say “this is the will of God”—give thanks, avoid immorality, present your bodies as a living sacrifice, and so on. The wisdom view maintained that God has told us how to live, and for the countless decisions of modern life… He put a head on your shoulders. Use your brain, pray for wisdom, apply biblical principles, seek godly counsel, and then make the best decision you can.

Detractors called this the “love God and do whatever you want” method. But in some ways, it makes sense. It frees you from the paralysis of trying to decode every impression or circumstance and puts the focus on faithful living. And aren’t there  moments where God simply says, “You choose.”

But then again… there are times when God leads people into decisions that don’t appear particularly “wise” by human standards—like taking a risk or giving when you can’t afford it or stepping into something uncomfortable or uncertain. Faith-filled steps don’t usually fit neatly into a pros/cons spreadsheet.

In later years, I learned more about our “union with Christ.” That as Christians, our lives are eternally bound up with His—we are in Christ and He is in us. And as we attune and abide in Him, we develop personal intimacy and communion with our Abba Father. God delights in relationship. Practicing the presence of the Holy Spirit is a lifelong process of learning to commune, listen and realign our actions and choices with the voice and values of Jesus.

As I’ve matured, I’ve come to see this less like choosing A, B, or C—and more like checking “all of the above.” Scripture anchors. Wisdom guides. But there’s also a growing experiential awareness of God’s presence—moment by moment. But clarity is not always God’s first priority- intimacy, dependence and Christlikeness is. God is not just directing decisions—He’s forming us as we go. And as that happens, His desires begin to feel more familiar and His promptings more recognizable.

Fast forward to the last few months, and I feel like God has been stretching me in this area. There have been several times throughout my days—when someone comes to mind, or I see a name on a list, and I experience an unmistakable: “I should call them.” More often, I text. And when I do, I’ve heard things like, “You have no idea what this means… thank you for reaching out,” or “I was just thinking about this very thing.” And out of my obedience flows something unmistakably providential. Pretty cool.

Then came April 2.

Our daughter-in-law was in labor in Germany. Josh had texted at 12:50 AM our time (6:50 AM there) that her water had broken and they were heading to the hospital. We didn’t get much sleep that night and the day unfolded with few updates. Our friends, Chris & Kathy were visiting from Virginia, so I kept a light schedule that day and spent the afternoon with them—greenhouses, spring flowers, Easter lilies—all with one eye on my phone. That evening we went out to eat and came home to wind down together. Pam and I were concerned. It had been 18 hours without word.

It was about 9 PM  (3:00 AM in Germany) and  I was sitting in the living room when I felt a visceral sense in my gut: “Pray for Josh & Alaina.”

A couple of minutes went by.

“Pray for Josh & Alaina.”

Then, almost as quickly: “Are you going to blow this off?”

None of this was audible—but it was unmistakable. It was like words were forming in my head.

“Hey guys, can we just pause and pray for Josh & Alaina?”

Everyone immediately agreed. Why had I hesitated?

I asked Chris to start. He began to pray—and about 15 seconds into it, my cell phone rang.

On the other side was Josh. “Dad, can we pray?” he said in a quavery voice.

“He wants us to pray…” I said.

Pam choked up. “We were praying!”

We put him on speaker, got a quick update, and all prayed together. It was precious.

As it turned out, the hospital had sent Josh home earlier—around 1:00 AM, because things weren’t progressing. It was hospital policy. Anxious and conflicted, he drove home, slept for about two hours, and was awakened at 3:00 AM (9:00 PM our time) by a call from the hospital summoning him immediately. Alaina had already been in labor for over 20 hours. Josh was exhausted. There was a language gap. It was the middle of the night, and he had no idea what he was walking into.

And somehow… at that exact moment… we were praying.

It was a privilege beyond words to bless my son and cast our care on our good Father. It was still a long haul until the birth. We didn’t receive word until about 3:51 AM Friday. After 28 hours of labor, at 9:44 AM in Germany, Evan was born safe and sound.

And we were reminded again that God is faithful to make our paths straight as we acknowledge Him (Proverbs 3:5–6).

I’ve come to call this experience “The Nudge.” That’s not a very theological term, but it captures that moment when I recognize—sometimes clearly, often not, sometimes in hindsight—the movement of God’s Spirit within my spirit. Not new revelation or something that overrides Scripture, but a distinct, prompting… a stirring… to act, speak, pray, or move in a certain direction.

I don’t always get it right. I hesitate. I second-guess. Sometimes I ignore it.

But sometimes… it’s confirmed in ways I never could have orchestrated.

And I’m learning—not just to wait for those moments, but to ask or expect them. To live with a growing awareness that God is present and active, and to invite Him to make His ways known. Not demanding clarity but cultivating attentiveness.

Maybe that’s part of the adventure.

Learning to walk closely enough with Him that when He nudges… we’re ready to respond.

Because sometimes… someone on the other side of the world is praying. And God is nudging us to join them.