Genesis 16:13  She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me!”

“What!?” my 9 year old daughter Katelyn said to me as I watched with obvious pleasure as she ate a cupcake.

“Aren’t I allowed to watch my own daughter that I love?” I inquired.

“No, Daddy!”  She said, turning away with embarrassment, but a shy smile played at the corners of her mouth.

Over the past month or so I’ve had the same reaction from her numerous times- while she’s practicing the piano, working on her homework at the kitchen table or even when she looks up from playing a computer game or reading a book. I love to watch her, especially when she is unaware.

“What!?”

“I’m just watching the daughter that I love…”

As I think about Katelyn’s life-experiences, her reaction to my attentive gaze doesn’t surprise me at all.  After 7 years in a Shanghai orphanage, she quickly discovered that attention from the authorities did not generally have a positive outcome.  Since the look of love was mainly absent in that environment she learned to fly under the radar, play her cards carefully and to view any attention from authority as negative and condemning.  Now in a family environment of love we find that she often she misreads glances, gentle correction and even loving focused attention. 

I think many Christians are like that too.  

We are properly taught in Christian theology that we enter the world under the curse of sin and at enmity with God.  We feel the weight of his disapproving glances, experience the conviction of falling short and know that “the wrath of God is coming on those who are disobedient (Ephesians 5:6).” But when we come to Christ all of that changes.  We are now accepted in the beloved (Ephesians 1:6), in Christ with no condemnation (Romans. 8:1), the children of God (1 John 3:1) and his friend (John 15:15).

But many precious sons and daughters of God who through Christ stand complete in the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21) still “feel” the condemning and negative gaze of their heavenly father.  They are fundamentally misreading his look.

“What!?”

“Aren’t I allowed to watch the son/daughter that I love?”

God sees you every moment of the day.  That’s a fact.  But how does that make you feel? Watched, criticized, judged, condemned, self conscious?  But what if it is the look of love?  What if your Father’s gaze is intended to lavish you with attention?  What if he wants you to bask in his glory and rest in his love.  What if he is just enjoying you and even in your worst moments his loving correction and gentle gaze is because he delights in you?  As you embrace the reality of your relationship with God and his ever-present gaze, you may just find that the gospel becomes “Good News” again and that Jesus’ “yoke is easy and his burden is light” (Matthew 11:30) and that his love is compelling (2 Corinthians 5:14).  For a Christian, God’s smile is more powerful than a frown.

You are the God who sees me! (Genesis 16:13)