A person’s own folly leads to their ruin, yet their heart rages against the Lord. Proverbs 19:3 (NIV)

I’ve been wrestling with a bad habit. I’m getting much better, but it still surfaces from time to time. Perhaps you can relate. When I’m alone, frustrated, and something goes wrong, I express my frustration with angry retorts.

For example, if I’m late for an elder meeting at the church and I’ve carelessly misplaced my keys, I’ll complain out loud, “COME ON…!!” Or, if I’m in my driveway unloading groceries, and an overloaded bag rips, sending a dozen apples bouncing bruisingly down the driveway, I might sarcastically mutter, “THANKS A LOT…!” Or after discovering a flat tire on my car at the end of a blazing hot day, my fuming response might be, “YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING…!!”

Maybe you react similarly or maybe you’re saying to yourself right now, “Ha! That’s mild. You should hear what I say in my head or out loud when something goes wrong!” Well, I’m keeping it G-rated, and my point is not about how colorful our language might be, or even the appropriateness of expressing anger in these situations. The question I’ve come to ask myself is, “Who am I talking to with these outbursts? Is it myself, the situation, or is it God?” When I vent my anger, am I indirectly accusing or blaming God for my circumstances or mistakes? If I were to complete those sentences, what would I say and what might it reveal?

“COME ON! … God, you’re all-knowing, why won’t you show me where my keys are?”
“THANKS A LOT! …You made the universe and me. Shouldn’t these bags be stronger or my judgement a bit sharper?”
“YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING! … Aren’t you in charge? Of all the times & places for a flat tire, why here and now?”

OUCH. It’s ridiculous, I know. That makes me sound selfish, petty, and self-absorbed. Hm…. Who am I talking to?

People ruin their lives by their own foolishness and then are angry at the LORD. Proverbs 19:3 (NLT)

But I think there’s a larger issue at play here. Many of us, believers and unbelievers alike, are expert blame shifters. We’re quick to blame others and especially God for our own mistakes or the broader brokenness of our world due to sin and selfishness. This goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden. When Adam sinned, instead of accepting responsibility for his own choices, he deflected to Eve and actually blamed God.  “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit … and I ate.” (Genesis 3:12)  Wow, that’s cheeky! But we’re little better when we blame God for financial difficulties, ill health, broken relationships, (or lost keys and overloaded bags) brought on by our own choices.

A few weeks ago, Pastor John preached an excellent message on sowing and reaping. In the sermon, he made the point that no one sows a pumpkin and harvests an apple. And one kernel of corn can produce 800 kernels of corn at full maturity. We reap in kind and in proportion to what we sow. Our actions have consequences.

Now, I believe in the sovereignty of God. He both knows and is in control of all things. His will is never frustrated, nothing takes Him by surprise and He takes the good and the bad and uses it to glorify himself and advance his kingdom purposes. But that doesn’t give us license to lay every wrong thing about this life on Him, when so often we’re the cause of our own misfortune.

People ruin their lives by their own stupidity, so why does God always get blamed? Proverbs 19:3 (The Message)

In moments of frustration and anger, it’s easy to cast blame outward, especially toward God. Proverbs 19:3 reminds us to take responsibility for our own actions. Instead of raging against the Lord, we should reflect on our own choices, repent and grow in wisdom and maturity.  We can both trust God and learn from and respond with grace to our own blunders and mistakes.

When a man’s folly brings his way to ruin,
    his heart rages against the Lord. Proverbs 19:3 (ESV)