James 1:17; 1 Corinthians 4:7

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father…

What do you have that you did not receive?

Sunday was my daughter Katelyn’s ninth birthday. It was actually only the second birthday she’s ever celebrated. In the orphanage in China they never celebrated birthdays at all and she came to us not even knowing she had one. Most people are shocked when they hear this, but knowing the situation in China- four hundred orphaned children, with 24 in Katelyn’s dorm room alone and being woefully understaffed; I can see how celebrating birthdays would be impractical and prohibitively expensive. Still, you’d have thought there might be a way to at least let a kid know they were born….

So to say that Katelyn was merely excited at the prospect of celebrating her birthday would be a massive understatement. She was more like “beside herself” with excitement. The anticipation nearly killed her and us. As soon as we hit November 1 it was all we could talk about. And finally the big day came.

Birthdays at the Benedict household are special. The birthday girl or boy gets to pick out all their favorite meals- breakfast (donuts), lunch (bought a special lunch at school on Monday) and dinner (spaghetti with homemade meatballs). They get to pick out their cake (our world famous chocolate cake with real strawberry icing) and ice cream (you guessed it… strawberry) and the color scheme (pink). They get a pass on all of their usual chores and the rest of the family picks up the slack. They get a balloon tied to their chair and eat off a special birthday plate. And of course, there are some presents.

So Saturday night after the kids were in bed Pam decorated the dining area in pink and yellow crepe paper and early Sunday morning I made a quick run to Dunkin Donuts. Then Pam went down and woke up Katelyn and the fun began. She woke up with wide eyes.

“ ‘Manda says I have a balloon upstairs?”

“Yes you do!” Pam replied. Big squeal.

She clambered up the stairs and entered the dining room to survey the decorations, pile of donuts and presents. She paused, took it all in and said, “I like this!.” And so began a day filled with the joy of watching a young child experience the grace of simply receiving.

As I look back on the day it was simple but still quite profound. I don’t suppose Katelyn received everything that she wanted, but by being open to receiving she was surprised by the creativity and thoughtfulness of everyone. There were times when she had to wait, but she seemed OK with that- she knew she would receive at the proper time. She picked out a game for the family to play and she didn’t win, but that was ok too- she got to pick it out and that seemed like it was enough. Because she received the whole day as a gift she was free to enjoy it all without a sense of entitlement. When you have no sense of expectation or deserving, how can you be disappointed?

As Americans we don’t always receive very well. We enter into situations with a sense of expectation or entitlement which invariably leaves us disappointed. Because we work hard, we operate more from a framework of rights- we believe we deserve certain things. It is tough for us to enter into the grace of receiving when we are used to earning, taking and meriting. This sometimes causes us to be critical of the gifts that we do receive. It is never enough. We can never be pleased.

And sometimes we drag that baggage into our relationship with God.

What if, like Katelyn’s birthday, we entered into every day with wide-eyed wonder and received it all as a gift from our Father? What if we set aside our sense of entitlement and our expectations and simply entered into the grace of receiving? If we believe that all of life is a gift, would we be happier and more content? Perhaps we would be able to recognize and more fully appreciate expressions of love from family and friends, even the imperfect ones.

Let the grace of receiving rise up in you and find joy and contentment anew. What do you have that you did not receive?